Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Stop Signs

I’ve been driving for about two years now and believe that I’m a pretty good driver. Ask my friends though, and they’ll have to disagree with that. Hahaha. Bottom line is that I speed and I don’t really stop at stop signs. I do what they call a “rolling stop”. Well, the other day I actually stopped at a stop sign, saying out loud “S-T-O-P”. That’s the way they teach you to stop in driving 101, right? I have to say, stopping for that long felt like one of the longest seconds of my life, but at the same time it was inspiring.

Afterwards, I realized that stop signs really serve a purpose. That purpose being, to make the driver come to a complete stop, making sure that there are no other cars passing by, so that the driver can safely continue driving. Then I started thinking that in life, there needs to be more stop signs. We as people are constantly running around, consumed with everyday life that we fail to see what’s coming at us. If we were to “stop” more often and think about stuff or be more aware of our surroundings, then we would probably be better off. It only takes a coupe seconds to “stop”, whether it be at a stop sign or in life. Maybe you should try it sometime.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


Everyone knows someone who has some kind of addiction, right? Well I never thought I would, but I do. It really gets to me sometimes. At times I just want to ignore everything about it, but I feel like I should be doing everything to stop it. So I try talking to them, but I have discovered that talking to someone who has an addiction is like talking to a brick wall. They never want to listen to anything you have to say. You may even get them to agree with you and say “yeah I have an addiction” but they still carry on with that addiction. So, they’ll admit that there’s a problem, but it means nothing to them. It’s just words that come out of their mouth. And you never know what they’re thinking or how they feel unless they talk to you. And even when they talk, nothing they say ever makes sense, because they talk in terms of an addict. At times they just say what they think you want to hear, just to satisfy you.

It’s always obvious to the person without the addiction that there’s a problem. As an outsider looking in on an addicts’ life, it’s awful to see what it does to a person and their surroundings. There’s so much struggle and battle with people involved, as well as with the person themselves. It’s all like a big game. I hate being a witness to addiction. All you can do is watch the addict destroy themselves slowly, but surely. I hate every minute of it. But let it be known that the only person that can help the addict is themselves. Nothing I do is going to make a difference. If anything, it probably makes it worse.

With any addiction, or any problem, nothing’s ever going to change unless the person admits there is a problem. That’s the first step in overcoming anything. And I know it can be embarrassing and then you’ll feel like a failure, because you’ve realized you’ve hit rock bottom, but maybe that’s what needs to happen. And I know that it’s hard to quit something once you’ve started, but it can be done. All you need is faith and belief in yourself and the willpower to pull through.

Monday, July 6, 2009

All I do is Think

I listen to a lot of music on a daily basis and I have many favorite songs, but there are some that mean more than others. Songs that I could listen to on repeat and never get sick of. One of these songs would be, “Nicest Thing” by Kate Nash. It just really captures all of my emotions. No matter where I am in my life, I can always relate to this song. Every time I listen to this song, I reflect upon my life, both past and present. The song itself is so mellow, but yet so emotional and I love every second of it. The lyrics are so relatable and clever. One of my favorite lines would be “I wish that you knew when I said two sugars actually I meant three”. “Nicest Thing” is definitely a song I could see my self writing, but Kate Nash beat me to it. Maybe one day I’ll be able to write lyrics like Kate Nash, but until then I’ll stick with what I have.

Yes, I write often. Of course, I write more when I’m going through troublesome times or something is bothering me, but that’s normal. I love writing my feelings and thoughts down, especially for future reference. I find that I repeat a lot of things through out my writing, so obviously there are certain themes which surround my life. I don’t mind it at all. And unfortunately, everything that I think, I don’t write down. That would be a little obnoxious.

And yes, I think. Without thinking, I would get nowhere. I find that every day after a certain time which is usually 8 pm maybe 9 pm, I go into thinking mood. Whether I’m with friends or by myself, I’ll just stare off into space and think deeply. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad. Personally, I believe it’s good because I’m sorting out my feelings. If I can’t understand my own feelings, how am I supposed to understand anyone else’s? Everyday, I feel as if I learn something new and if not, then I just reflect on something old. Hopefully, I never stop thinking. That would be a tragedy.